I think about writing on my blog literally EVERYDAY. There is always a topic to write about, sometimes it's something happy and exciting, other times tough or sad or controversial. I just can't seem to get it together enough to actually put it together. Sometimes I even write whole articles in my head.
Yesterday I read an awesome article that basically called moms to forgive themselves for not living up to the ideals and pressures put forth on us in this very driven and PUBLIC time we are living in. So today I am forgiving myself for not writing in the blog that people are always asking me about. I asked you to read it, and I don't always deliver. I am going to TRY to find the time, put in the effort, because I know in the end it is so good for me and I think some people are genuinely interested. And if I don't write, it's probably because I am trying to manage...the kiddos, the laundry, the driving, and most likely my own head!
Since I last wrote amazing things have happened. In many houses it would be considered the small stuff...in ours it's HUGE stuff. Anthony moved to a big boy bed, where he has more room to move around and we can crawl in with him. It was a transition I pondered for so long. He didn't really understand it and it was rough the first couple of nights...the first night he wouldn't even look at it! But he adjusted well and I think he really likes it now! He actually woke up the other night and I went in and settled him. I thought he went back to sleep and about 30 minutes later we heard a loud bang. He had somehow rolled beyond the rails and fell out. He was on his head with his legs in the air resting against the bed. I was so scared that he had broken his neck! He has zero ability to brace or protect himself from a fall. He was shaken up but totally fine. I guess we will start thinking about a special needs bed soon.
Anthony is making fantastic strides. He is holding his own bottle and sippy cup (though still likes to get mom and dad to do it when he doesn't feel like it!) He is doing a great job working on walking in his pacer at school. They encourage him to walk to the slide or trampoline at school and he gets to use them as a reward when he does. Unfortunately he has grown too tall for his pacer at home. We are waiting for insurance to approve a new one. He wants to stand and move all the time so we are trying our best to give him those opportunities. He is also trying very hard to use his voice and make new sounds and word approximations.
I won't tell you there haven't been challenges. He gets frustrated easier these days it seems, and can't always do what he'd like to be able to. There are seating problems, and feeding issues, and communication challenges. But we continue to focus on the positive because he truly continues to light up our life everyday. We are so proud of him and everyone who meets him falls in love. One of my favorite moments is watching his teachers wheel him from the car into school everyday. All the teachers from the entire building are out front greeting kids and taking them off vans and buses. Many stop and gush, place hands over hearts and tap each other to look as my son passes through. I tear up as I read "oohhhh he is soooo cute" off their lips. It's precious for me to witness and some confirmation that he is well loved at school.
The other night Gianna and I were able to spend some quality mommy-and-me time together after the boys went to sleep. She curled up next to me on the couch and we chatted. She beamed and proudly exclaimed, "mom, someday when I grow up I hope I have a child with disabilities...because I'm really into Anthony and I really love him so much." I must be doing something right....